the sponge bob
by Wario the TableMan
Summary: crunchy artichoke dip


"SpongeBob, where are your glasses?" Mrs. Puff harshly remarked.

 _This is the tenth stinkin' butt time, Puffs…_ SpongeBob sighed with angst caressing his tone. He took out his fold-out comb and threw it at Fonzi.

Fonzi caught the magical staff and became enlightened to the yellow sponge's ideology.

SpongeBob smirked at his boating school teacher once more and then returned his gaze to the Krabby Patty on the window sill.

"SquarePants! Where is your report?" said Mrs. Puff in an even angrier voice.

SpongeBob got all his teeth in line and then shot that Mrs. Puff. The enamel piercings caused Mrs. Puff to burst and further deflate into a sack of disrespect. SpongeBob spat on his own shoe.

"Blimey…" said Patrick as he entered through the front door. "SpongeBob, are you mad?"

SpongeBob turned to Patrick and did the loop-de-loop and pull. "My shoes are looking cool…" he said with darkness grazing his larynx. He pulled out his cheese pistol and shot Patrick in the nose.

Patrick had no nose. He lived because of this.

SpongeBob ran up to Patrick and licked his eyelids, just for making sure.

It was too dangerous to go alone. He took it.

Patrick moaned as he struggled to rise. He put a hand on the hilt of his katana. But before the pink starfish was able to draw his blade, he was knocked down by SpongeBob's IQ.

SpongeBob proceeded to lick the katana and began rehearsing Shakespeare backwards as best as he could.

The mesmerising chant opened up a portal to the Nether. SpongeBob jumped in and brought his diamond pickaxe.

Gavin Free was waiting for SpongeBob in the Nether with some chance cubes.

"I'm SpongeBob," said SpongeBob in his voice.

"I know, but Michael will refuse to hear it," said Gavin. He unfurled his nose and took the power in through his nostrils.

SpongeBob grinned and got the katana inside his ear. "I can't feel so much hatred ANYMORE!" A single tear dropped from his duct to the netherack floor.

Squidward crawled out from the lava below and made SpongeBob a Roblox account. "Hello, it is time for your little yellow tush to become mine, SquarePants!"

SpongeBob did a scowl in his face and charged at Squidward with his pickaxe. "I'm bringing the patty for the hungry customer!" he roared at the cephalopod.

"So they can eat it?" Squidward got cheeky and a bit squeaky in his rear.

"When I give it to ya!" SpongeBob slapped Squidward in the face and Squidward's nose let out the green strand. SpongeBob inhaled the green strand into his own nostril cavern and converted it to post nasal drip.

"Mr. Krabs would not be impressed," said Squidward in a sour way as he grabbed his nose to squeeze out the excess fibers.

SpongeBob began to speak Japanese and this was enough to destroy all of Wales.

Pearl had died.

Mr. Krabs now had no lovely, darling daughter. He wept for his dead whale.

Squidward felt the fury from Krabs's love. He channeled the energy and leapt upon SpongeBob's head and licked his ears. He made origami in his left and a duke in his right.

SpongeBob never felt such a sensation in his canals, so he refused belief. SpongeBob's nose flung up all on its own after hearing a choir of angels.

SpongeBob's nose penetrated Squidward's biggest toe. Squidward fell to the ground and was consumed by the Wither Skeletons.

"ARGH!" SpongeBob growled in pain as he pulled his eyes out to examine his canals. He saw Squiward's beautiful paper crane in his left and the steaming toad in his right. SpongeBob writhed in agony as he thought about life.

"Hey, don't I get a say in this?" said a familiar voice. SpongeBob turned around and his eyes widened in horror.

It was Bubble Buddie. SpongeBob had very few choices now.

"Watashi no mimi ni tsumazuku…" said the heart of SpongeBob.

Bubble Buddie said a thing, but SpongeBob didn't hear it well due to his ear status. The death was imminent and SpongeBob did it to Bubble Buddie.

Juggling is so hard…

My canvas…

Umbrella-ella-ella-ey-ey-ey…

M-P-r Woooo DE QU Q S LL b d ax as o LLL co ow P: K: T'" ,R. yy…

Even still…

Even STILLL…

Twilighttttttt

O

SpongeBob felt his anger rise. He slammed down an entire deck of cards upon the grave of Mr. Krabs's darling daughter. "Watashi wa mou jibun no kangae o kiku koto ga dekimasen. Watashi wa shi ga shinde shimattara ii naa…" he said with a sigh

He sighed.

Now was just a shattered fragment for him. He would survive just as Nick Wilde had.

Nick Wilde was such a hot individual anyhow.

SpongeBob had a huge life to live now. He had to return the katana to Patrick. He left with scorn in his throat and evil to schedule for annihilation.

FIN


End file.
